Tim O’Brian, in the Rainy River, is strongly against going to war and so for his own personal well-being he runs away to freedom from others. He strongly feels that he himself is too good for this war. The discriminating looks from his parents, and from his community, were too much to bare and so Tim ran towards freedom, the Canadian border. For my own personal well-being, I would like to have a career that I will enjoy for, hopefully, the rest of my life. I see no point in living life when you do not enjoy what you do as a living. Being in grade twelve, I have to make a decision about post secondary school choices and my mother wants to have main choice in what I take and where I would attend. I have to please her or else the disappointment will never disappear from her voice. It is ultimately my choice; however, I am not sure if my internal demands win against the external demands.
For Tim, he had a very difficult time when it came to him competing internally with the external demands. His internal demands are that when he gets the letter from the government he freaks out because he believes that he himself is way too good for this war. The anger built inside him until he snapped; he had to get away. It was hard to leave but he felt like he had to do this. For my internal demand I had a similar experience, just not as grand as Tim O’Brian’s. I feel that I must strive for the best, even though it might not happen. My goal is to become an ultrasound technician or an x-ray technician; it is something that I have always wanted to do. The courses are extremely hard to get into; however, it makes me strive harder. My will power to get into them is my driving force behind my internal demands.
In the Rainy River, Tim has multiple external demands that affect his ability to pursue his personal well-being. One external demand was the physical river/boundary itself because it forces Tim to make a decision. Another external demand would be society as a whole; meaning his community, parents, and everyone he has met. At that point in time young men were expected to go to war or else they were thought of to be cowards and were frowned upon by the public. This created peer pressure. The last factor would be from Elroy, the old man at the cabin. Elroy would be an external demand because he made Tim feel less anxious because Elroy did not judge Tim about questioning going to the war; and so Elroy was almost supporting Tim, no matter what path Tim had decided to go. My personal external demands are not as large as Tim`s, which is both good and bad. It is a good thing because there would not be as many people trying to force my decision or criticize what I chose; but then again, there are less people that support my choice. Being in grade twelve means that it is time to apply to different post secondary schools, let alone figure out what you are going to do with your life. Graduation is almost like the Rainy River because it kind of forces you to make a decision at that time. Sure people wait for a year or two until they make a decision but most are encouraged to choose prior to graduation. Parents like to control most aspects of your life, or so it seems in most cases, and so they like to help their child with deciding their education route. My mother likes to go control most situations (if not all) and so she pushed me in the general direction of the medical field. Not only did my mother do this but also the rest of my family. The only family member that has supported me in no matter what I decide is my father. He is like Elroy in a way that he supports me and does not make judgments against me.
In conclusion, I think that when you personally want or desire something so badly then the negative external forces should not affect the individual’s choice or decision. What the person should allow are the internal and positive external demands. The demands are not truly demands but are rather implicated.
There's a lot of analysis of the text here, not that there's anything wrong with that, but it does distract from the exploration of your own experience. In the end, I'm left with one question -- do you, as O'Brien did, feel paralyzed by your position?
ReplyDelete